04/29/2018 08:21 pdt

We have no site news or developments for this entry.

The Island and the Cigarette Girl

Part Eight

read ( words)


No more Juliette clinging to me and speaking words of love and caring into my heart, no more of her endless sexiness slathered all over me, and no more awakenings with that beautiful soul next to me smelling like smoldering, flaming desire within golden skin. No more. Fuck it all, I had to pull up slightly and move around for the blood flow. She was better -- I was told in no uncertain terms -- and I simply had to put on the fucking long pants and figure out where to go. Still crushed, hurt, and folded in half, but forward was the only way. Otherwise? Yep... Ramming my sorry head into the fucking glass. So, I dressed and headed downstairs to attempt finding a drink without breaking down like a soggy toothpick. Ugh. Juliette. My love. Fuck.

Upon reaching the casino floor, realizing that every step I took with her would run through my head began to inject pain inside. I walked with purpose over the big bridge and into the Mandalay Bay and its glowing embrace. Across the casino and straight to the Island. I plopped down in front of the video poker machine and tried to relax. Juliette's scent and eyes did not leave my head at all. I had to keep hold of the thoughts of her being happy, better, surviving whatever came along. Back and forth over and over from the happiness of meeting that dream, spending so much warmth together, and the subsequent loss that morning along with crushing sadness. Sitting there at the Island became a tennis match in my head. And that was something to which I did not react well considering the imminent exit from Vegas. Extending my stay was a reach, but I did not know what to do or anything which could help. Minutes into my first cocktail, a thin blonde came along and sat next to me bearing one of the many convention badges. I glanced, reared slightly, and returned to myself. No one needed my affliction or issues broadcasted -- as compelling as falling toward any receptive female was during that morning. I had to stay quiet, and keep the dire nature of my thoughts away from prying eyes. She addressed me.

'Here alone?'

No other words for a time, just a smile. Being careful was priority. One caring look and I would have collapsed. Thank the stars I still had the room, just in case. And I wanted to gush all of it while attached to a woman. I needed it like I needed to be back wrapped around the dream that was Juliette. The blonde played her machine quietly, and I sat with all manner of swirling confusion and dread piling upon my head. One word from her and I felt as if I would grab hold and cry. Just maintain, please.

'Are you doing ok?' Crap. Fuck.
'Hanging in there I guess.' Oops.
'Want to talk about it? I have lots of time.' Shit. Pause.

Why? Perhaps my face was a billboard filled to the edges with a sad story I could not hide. Fucking hell, anyway. I smiled and told Lanie I needed some hours to process the past few days. What I did not tell her about was the years-long period leading up to my dashing from life. That was a can of worms which had to remain seamed. My mental micrometer ensured a tight seal. Juliette? Anything and everything. A stranger? Nope... Closed off and hurting. I went on about being there for a few more days to wrap my head around a woman with whom I spent time. Her face displayed interest in my words, and when I touched upon the fact that the sadness was related to a woman, her face showed genuine concern. Lanie then asked me to sit tight and await her return.

'I'm not going anywhere.'

A quick touch to my hand, and she left. I had hoped she would not return at all because I was already sensing the flood and a lack of control. I watched her walk toward the lobby (naturally, and being the person who seldom looked away) and held my position. Again I sulked, again I flew. Still with the back and forth about the dream. I felt Lanie's caring, which left me flailing wildly for a good direction. Of course, sitting at a bar drinking felt like my only choice in the short term. Anything else was too much of a stretch.

Badass Joe Zito dropped my second Jack & Ginger in front of me along with yet another glass of water. He stood there and regaled me with all of the ideas in his head for the future of transportation and space travel. I was wearing a shirt which was a gift from SpaceX during our testing of the Dragon capsule prior to them engineering everything into an actual flight. My being involved in the space program interested him greatly and provided some conversation between the two of us. The service bar was to my right with its never-ending slough of beautifully-clad cocktail servers and their work keeping the tables happy. I spoke with a few of them on and off, and by that point in the trip they were calling me by name. Yep. Hours at that bar.

I sat there and enjoyed some pleasant rapport with staff. I also could not help but gaze at the servers' outfits -- one of them with dermal implants all over her lovely hands and upper chest. Tall, blonde, friendly, and ever the gorgeous example of the female form. Naturally I was doing my best not to stare and simply engage her in some light remarks here and there regarding the clientèle and their comments toward the female staff serving them. She seemed a bit disillusioned with the sexist nature of the industry, which I knew intimately. I backed off my thoughts of complimenting her due to my desire of keeping things personable. And she did not need any more bullshit from yet another barfly. I held my tongue and focused upon speaking with Joe. But Jesus God in heaven, inside me was the typical storm which has been laid out here for years. Longer I stayed, and slowly the idea of additional nights built up inside my head and helped me to relax more than earlier. Aside from going home and dealing with difficulty on a hell of a scale, staying in the resort would at least allow me to think.


Holy bleeding fuck was Ashley ever thin

'Cigars, cigarettes.'

A lovely young thing visited with her tray of smoking needs. She was very thin (like too thin, almost), but with so much hair that the enormity likely contributed to her offset appearance. The girl was fucking cute and very smiley and flirty. She continued approaching, one foot in front of the path of the other showing off her young age. I stared as usual, watching her legs move and dreaming of Juliette heading out in front of me and commanding my vision. And then she would turn and smile, leaving me in a storm of passion and desire. The cigarette girl smiled and continued, providing none of the same, but I wished to dive up her dress anyway. There was no getting around it. Too weak, too needy. That thought sent me back to Lanie's return, and due to desiring the cigarette girl, I began to see the possibility of yet another distraction from the dream. Maybe? Hmm. Would it help? Hmm again. Or perhaps when Lanie came back I could have turned on the wordsmithing and left her in a hole, void of responses. No, I could not. Lanie had been very kind, and worst case would be no conversation at all. Or leaving. And she arrived just as I was shuffling the possible scenarios.

'You ok?'
'More or less.'
'Not yet.' Heh. Giggle.

She sat again, and asked if I wished to talk. Damn shit fuck. I was at a loss and looking at her glasses and slender nose. I wanted to lick her fingers. Fuck me... shut it off for crying out loud, basket case. I asked to be left alone for the most part, but some chit chat was fine. As nice as I tried to come across, I ended up piquing her interest even more. The eyes were expressing concern but I had no fucking idea from where that came. We sat, spoke of the convention and casino, and drank slowly. The cigarette legs returned, smiled, and I gestured to her. She came close and I whispered that she looked gorgeous in the black dress and heels. Her age again came through when she bit her lower lip slightly, causing my head to descend into an enormous fantasy of pulling her ass to my face. God damn. The drug again, and right in front of me. Lanie smiled as if to convey a lack of surprise at my being so forward and Joe raised his eyebrows, commenting on the same. I didn't care if she would have responded or not, but I had no reason to avoid trying. Nothing to lose, and everything to gain. And I gained. The cigarette heroin pointed to her name tag, hanging directly above a breast I wished to swallow whole. Oy God, my mind was immediately erased. Ashley stood there before me -- and I mean close -- until I decided to be reckless.

'Would you have dinner with me?'
'Yes. Anytime.'

She waddled off carrying her tray and a playful smile, leaving me with no information whatsoever about contact, a place to dine, or a time. Nice. That behavior pushed me to learn a bit of the personality within her and I could not help but laugh. A dinner invitation and an immediate response. Acceptance with a big, bright smile and the bitten lip again. Oh boy. Lanie watched the exchange, likely thinking I had been lonely and wanted some company. Nope. Just a distraction. Another one. As the little Ashley walked away, my hand was snagged quickly. Lanie told me that her thought was interrupted by me asking Ashley for a date. Hmm. She apparently was close to asking me to dinner for protracted conversation. Huh? I replied yes, and upon seeing her happy with my answer, the day began to improve. Then...

'That girl is adorable.'
'Yes, and I am hoping to be in contact with a certain portion of her skin.' Laughter, and then disbelief.
'Yep. I need it.' More giggling and her hand again.


The girl stirred all of me

I spoke to Joe more and he outlined his idea for traveling without the necessity of aircraft or spacecraft. Oy. He was something else, all right. On and off the servers came by for their table orders and the banter continued. They were all wearing bright red skirts, skimpy tops which made their midsections visible, and high heels. Every single one of them was lovely, too. There was no getting around all of the desire in my head but I kept it at bay. At no time did I allow myself to step beyond the everyday conversation and move toward anything inappropriate. That type of behavior was reserved for those reckless males in the lounge. None of the girls needed any more of it so I stayed respectful. That was a fucking stretch, considering my history of a loose tongue and looser morals. Plus, the prospect of spending time with Ashley sans work outfit was enticing enough to help maintain stability (somewhat). A compliment tossed out here and there did not seem out of line, and each of the lovelies smiled and accepted such things pleasantly. Eventually I had to stop for fear of the alcohol unlocking my needs and allowing them to escape. I succeeded. And I dreamed, as usual.

I asked how long Lanie would be in town, and learned that another three days were on tap. She had boosted her business trip in order to relax. Meeting me was not something I felt was a good thing for anyone, but that was her choice. I told Lanie I was beyond wrecked that day and my behavior would be less than healthy. No worries, Lanie said, and perhaps she could help. Doubtful, but I would not push her away. The woman was too sweet and kind. Unfortunately, she also had no idea of my nature.

'Is that how you see me?'
'That is how I view some women, yes.' Sigh.
'Um... Ok.'
'I've already gone around the world in eighty seconds with that thought, my dear. Believe me.'

And that was the second of two meals with individuals I did not know a mere hour earlier. Lanie stayed there next to me a long while, and asked tentatively of the cause of my state of mind. I gave her nothing, save for the occasional glance with glassy eyes. And then she seemed to feel more compelled to stick close. I was turning into more a definition than a person, however the words were still as sharp as a scalpel. I tried to sit and be pleasant, but the loss was too great. Still reeling from the heated and teary sex, as well as Juliette's abrupt (necessary) exit just a short time earlier, I was lucky to be sitting there at all. A different location seemed more likely when my room door slammed upon Juliette leaving... The pavement on I-15 north. Bad fucking shape. Bad, and there was no getting around showing it. Lanie sensed that something had gone badly. She continued to express concern no matter how much I resisted. So, I gave up the fight and addressed her with a much more friendly demeanor. She stayed the course, eventually asking that we move to the lounge. Nope. That would mean a scantily-clad server would be visiting and I did not need any more curves flying through me. Ashley came along during weakness and that was something I could not resist. Juliette said 'go be happy, babe.' So I tried. My companion at the Island seemed genuine, so I stowed the proverbial syringe and focused upon her. Turning my barstool and full attention toward those lovely glasses made Lanie smile. We talked a long while until Ashley and her delicious ass returned, causing me to spin. I pictured all manner of acts while staring at her form. Her cuteness drove me nuts, too. That fucking hair down to the seam of her dress, smooth, young skin, and the slight cleavage beckoning me to dive into her bra. God damn it on a fucking hilltop, she was something else. Lanie's reaction next to me was unsurprising. Disbelief at my pressing nature for the second time, and with a look which spoke volumes. I kind of liked it, but could not fully rip myself away from that little shapely ass standing and awaiting attention. I dove, bought cigarettes, and drooled. Yep, the heroin was in her undies, of course.

Again she trotted off with a glance back over the shoulder. Still no information, and that meant playfulness. Well, it worked. I would have set myself on fire and laid in the street for a glimpse of that delicate narcotic. Waiting. So I carried on speaking with my second dinner partner and things began to move along causing me to realize Lanie was a gem. More waiting, more exchanges, and more booze. As the hour was still early, we decided that to get together later would be nice. I stared for several moments, and then requested she wear heels of some flavor along with anything off the shoulder allowing me to gaze at her structure. Her reaction was priceless...

'You're going to tell me how to dress?'
'I am asking, silly.'

Holy blinding shit, the result was hilarious as Lanie giggled and looked upon me as if I was the devil. In a manner of speaking, and considering she hailed from the Midwest, I probably appeared as such. None of it mattered, though, because her interest was apparent and obviously went beyond simple words. I saw the eyes, body language, and flirty gestures which told me I could act the same toward her. The reason for her being in Vegas notwithstanding, she approached me at the Island -- not the other way around. Soon my responses were more pointed but still she took them in stride. God love her, anyway.

After some decent time I asked Lanie to accompany me to my room at the Luxor for both privacy and more conversation. She reluctantly agreed, and her answer seemed nervous. I assured her that my intentions were nowhere near out of line. She could see that my eyes were the guarantee and we soon headed to the big inclinator. Along the way I dreamed of the constant contact with Juliette through those paths, and wanted to bury my face in her neck for comfort. No way. The vision was there, regardless of Lanie's hesitation. I tried to sidle up to her a bit, and that gesture was returned to me immediately. Wow. The feeling was so nice after falling into a hole during the morning. Upon reaching my door, she stated that distance was important while inside. No entanglements? No problem. We entered and I asked about some refreshments. Lanie made herself comfortable on the sofa and glanced around commenting in a good way about my room choice. I remarked that I had been there for some days minus a side trip to California. Her reply was appreciative, if nervous. The phone told me that our hors d'oeuvres would arrive within the hour, leaving Lanie and me time to delve a bit into life. We did, and due to my increasing desire to smother her with myself, I ended up gushing about Juliette like a dam in need of repair. On and on without restraint, all the while feeling everything related to that dream slamming me over and over. I could not stop, and aside from being interrupted by a knock at the door, there was no limit.

Appetizers and a bottle of wine, along with my sharp memory painting pictures of Juliette and I enjoying the same, and on that very sofa just a short time before. Lanie saw the pause and my early tears, pushing her to comfort me. I could not resist her kind concern. Hugs, breathing, and me melting into her waiting shoulder. Soon I was crying heavily and holding on for my life. Lanie said nothing other than whispering that everything would be ok. I sank, shivered, and needed more care than I was prepared to admit. She did not bat an eye at all. My hands were gripped as I took a seat next to her and tried to live through the difficulty in realizing Juliette was gone for all time. Lanie simply held on and waited. She sat there and gripped me quietly for some time. As I began to calm, my hand found hers. Tightly holding, I drifted into sleep. Dreams.



When I awakened, I was still on the sofa, but sans Lanie. She was gone and I again felt very alone. She had removed my shoes and shirt, covered me with a blanket and exited my room. Damn. Upon seeing the clock, I spied a note there sitting with one of the flowers from the arrangement which came with the room. Lanie's phone number, along with 'text me when you get up. please.' Absolutely, and immediately. Her response was equally quick, bless that big heart. She returned moments later and gave me a warm hug. Wonderful. My mind was still awash with Juliette and Ashley's little ass, but a kind soul next to me lifted things off my shoulders enough to relax it all. We spoke a bit and then left for the Island. Lanie had altered her plans to spend more time with me, informed me that my company was helping her to a degree, and she did not mind being a bit of a therapist. That was so sweet I nearly fell to her again. Fucking hell. A few minutes after sitting back at the bar, Lanie's phone rang and she had to dash for some business in the lobby. She left after a soft touch to my hand, and I was again alone with my thoughts and waiting to see her again, along with Ashley's sexy saunter and perhaps some dinner plans.

After one of my many trips to the restroom, I sat up on the shoe shine station near the Island and a young woman polished my leathers beautifully. While sitting and watching her excellent work, I spied Ashley and her shapely legs strolling about the poker machines. When she looked toward me, I smiled and gave her a slight wave. Ashley walked directly to me with purpose, stuffed a note into my shirt pocket, smiled, and ran her hand quickly across my cheek.

'See you soon.'

Yes! She went back to her route and I ripped the note out to read. The woman finishing my shoes looked up at me and smiled. On the cocktail napkin... 'I am off at eleven. Meet me across the street at the corner entrance to the Tropicana at twelve.' Yes again. I had no idea what to expect, but damned if I was not going to be there with bells on. And considering the massive amount of time I had spent in Vegas, I immediately understood her need to go outside the resort ownership in order to spend time with a guest. No matter. I would have met her anywhere in town. Wait a second... Twelve? Didn't I ask her to dinner? Hmm.

I returned to the bar to find Lanie waiting for me. I sat and greeted her, asking if everything was ok. She replied that it was all business, and with the call and subsequent lobby meeting, her duties were complete, leaving her free to spend all the time we wished together. After a while, Ashley came around hawking her wares, smiling at me, and looking like heaven in a black dress again. She paused upon reaching us and nodded in appreciation of my desire to see her socially. I stared right through her and telegraphed my want with an expression of lust. One more quick hand to mine, and off again. As Ashley waddled away, Lanie noticed my eyes following along. She told me that I might have an easier time avoiding difficulty if I could have pulled my brain out of that girl's dress. Nope. No way. An opportunity had presented itself and I was unable to let go. Not me. Others? Perhaps. Me? No way. My sorry head was already halfway up her slender leg and the speed was increasing. Lanie just laughed and waved off the thought, likely learning that the rails to my addiction had no switches. Ashley was the type of draw which had been written in stone. Watching her walk sent me into a very familiar vein. Nothing good, of course, but I knew it well.

The conversation at the Island went on for some time, leaving Lanie at a loss as to helping. I was not trying to be difficult but maintained a solid position. I had no choice. She kept up with the caring eyes and manner which took me aback for a time, despite my outspoken desire. Soon I softened somewhat in order to allow her to inquire further of my difficult mindset and lifestyle. Upon doing so, her face seemed to be expressing a sincere need to help. Lanie was beginning to make my issues lighten with her words, and more importantly, her listening with a lack of judgment in any direction. Sweetness, again.

'We can have dinner before you go jump that young thing.' Giggles.
'Um, yeah.'

I told her that we could dine whenever she wished, and received another smile along with deference to the decision.

'Stripsteak, doll.'
'Doll? Wow.'
'Yep. Stripsteak bar, five.'
'That's pretty positive.'

I told her I wished to clean up before heading over there, so we parted, leaving my head appreciating her being so caring. She had approached me at a time when I was falling. Her soft eyes were comforting along with the lovely glasses. Her smile and voice were beginning to cause a similar desire to that of my first hours with Juliette, and along such lines the pain was easing up. The morning had been hellish and cutting, the afternoon found me more comfortable and able to deal with the separation. Lanie wanted to help. She did, and dinner looked better and better. As I moved toward the pyramid, my eyes were not darting about the spaces and wandering into the clothing of passing females. I was seeing eyes and expressions instead of breasts and asses. Hmm. Survival, perhaps.

Back in my room I showered, dreaming of that woman over and over. I missed her to a great degree which left me pondering Lanie's company. Was I going to dive toward her physically? Oy. I had to try avoiding pushing for that even though I needed it as much as Ashley's young ass all over my face. Juliette had been heavenly despite our combined issues. Lanie also came across as kind, caring and understanding and inside me the need to hold her was increasing. She had a long neck that screamed to be slathered with attention. Fuck, pushing that behind conversation started to become arduous. I hoped her dinner attire would not be smoking hot, but I knew all the while that her glasses and fingers were going to be an issue. I dressed as best I could and moved back across the bridge into the Mandalay Bay. The Island seemed a cozy place to wait.

As I approached, I could see the bar was full. Fuck me, to the lounge and those fucking servers. I sat as far from others as I could and the damned girl approached immediately, looking the part to a tee. Jesus fucking crap, I could not look away from her and stumbled upon ordering. She smiled back brightly with squinting eyes and impeccable makeup before walking to the service bar. Fuck. There it was again... the drug in her clothing. Stab me with a needle, please. The tall brunette returned, again with a cute smile, and dropped my scotch to the table without taking her eyes off mine. I complimented her service and told her I would refrain from gushing over her beauty. She responded that most of the time the words came and went unnoticed, and anything beyond was a rare occasion. I stared, keeping my gaze locked on her face and held back with huge effort.

'Go ahead.'
'You have the shoulders and arms of uncompromising form. Unreal, my dear.' Smile.
'Haven't heard that before. Usually it's the boobs.'
'Holy fuck are you ever much more than that.' Blush and bye bye.

I awaited her return with hungry vision and thoughts of flying up that skirt. She had the shape of a model, yet carrying quite the pair of breasts. I could understand the drunken and loosened tongues of guests there and heard all of it before, leaving me with the typical disdain for the same. I had my own issues which often caused me to flee a situation before becoming too vocal out of respect, and considering my past, it was a stretch more often than not. Still, I kept myself composed and did not look in her direction until she visited the table. When that took place, I began to feel the ocean of words I needed to express to her. Within that mass, dreams of her thighs and ass were at the forefront and waiting to be let loose. Pushing back, maintaining control over my tongue, sitting still without flooding the woman with my ways... Everything took much effort. She addressed me when my glass was getting low, and in that question came the word handsome. Oh shit. Maybe? Hmm. Still I pushed against the addictive nature of throwing a lure out and wishing for a solid snag. Nothing aside from cordial words and a thank you. I wondered if she was awaiting something more, and lost myself in the possibilities. And then the narcotic called and I opened the door upon her dropping my second scotch.


Thin, yet no less curvy

'Would you care to spend time with me?'
'What did you have in mind?'

Holy blue fuck, I really could not tell her that in mind was her sex all over my face, so I kept it polite.

'The Seahorse in Caesars, perhaps?'
'Ok, handsome.'

Wow. She left for the other tables and I flew through the clouds with dreams. Very nice, and another little help to my mostly-diminished ability to let Juliette leave my head. My mind also desired seeing those breasts freed from clothing and wrapped around my face. I had no respite from the carnal thoughts and incredible visions of that tall one in every possible position. Jesus, still a basket case and nowhere near relief nor any effort to separate myself from anything which could eventually harm me. Lanie's arms, Ashley's gorgeous ass, Lori's glaring breasts, and more alcohol. I soon began to descend awaiting the meeting for dinner. Was I hungry? Sure, but the special was not an entree, it was a trio of females and right up my fucking alley. At that moment I saw Lanie glance from the path to Stripsteak and quickly turn toward my location on the edge of the Island lounge. I was relieved at the sight of her approaching, and thankful she missed out on me drooling over yet another shot of drugs.

'Hello again.'

Nod. Smile. She hugged me tightly and sat.

The tall and beautiful server then stopped by long enough to hand me a note with her number. Lanie shook her head and saluted my endless feelers in the direction of picturesque women. She stated that our attendant was tall, to which I only nodded as my head was still stuck in her undergarments. And Lanie's too, due to her outfit choice of a sleeveless blouse, soft low-rise jeans, and open-toed heels around slender feet. She looked like dessert so I told her the clothing decision was fantastic. Her eyes brightened behind those glasses as I spoke. Holy crap did she ever appear wonderfully dressed. God damn it anyway. I held back from going further into her appearance so as to avoid embarrassing her or myself. She likely knew it anyway, but to vocalize was just not a good choice. Soon, though, the booze would take the fencing away and allow me to more easily speak my deviant mind. No shit, and after a while I figured why the fuck not. Lanie seemed to be warming up to me somewhat which also pushed me further into such territory. When the server returned, I closed the tab along with thanking her for the attention and her number. She smiled back and whispered, 'Text me.' Deep breath.

We took off for the restaurant, which was maybe a hundred feet from the big lounge. From one bar to the other, and at the very second they began to serve. Aberlour over a perfect cube along with a glass of Pinot Noir. Lanie and I sat and talked while watching the bartender hand-stuffing olives with blue cheese and worked up an appetite. To that point in the day I had eaten exactly nothing due to the difficulty in watching Juliette leave, so some sustenance was on tap. Lanie wished to move to the dining room when it opened, but I preferred to stay at the bar. That didn't happen. She insisted, so after the first round we took a table for two in the corner. Damn it, but I could not say no to her. I wanted to explore so much that there was no resisting anything she wished. Lanie knew all of it, naturally, through my constant drug need and speaking to anyone who might respond. So, I went in further... pressing gently toward finding quiet intimacy with her heart, and more.

'Oh my.'

Yes, further. I asked to have dessert in my pyramid room and she accepted. A splendid idea, but unknowing of where it may lead. No matter, because the Ashley heroin and the same from Lori the server had already been secured. Ashley was a tad frightening due to her very young age, but Lori was older and seemed much more relaxed. Both pulled me equally. Lanie was a huge comfort and I needed to keep that thought close while we interacted. The last thing I needed to do was alienate someone so kind and attentive. She knew me well enough by that point to know what was in my head, but I still considered the massive upside of being with a caring soul. The sex was then turned off inside me.


Ashley's skin and hair were so beautifully young

During the long and relaxing meal, Lanie commented upon my seemingly endless addiction to females and their attention, to which I responded that I failed to exercise control because I just did not care. Her face fell somewhat with the obvious disappointment in my fatalistic attitude and self-defeating lifestyle appearing all over me in stark detail. Lanie did not like it at all, and reacted badly whenever I made an off-hand comment regarding my downward position in life. Her hand would grip me tight enough to restrict circulation.

'Stop it, please.'

Ugh. Speaking my mind was not something she absorbed easily. I had to reign in my negativity and keep the wording light or the woman would blow up. My issues were mostly out in the open by that point, so I failed to see the harm in blurting more. She listened with bright eyes and sharp attention until I went across a certain line and into the territory I had previously avoided for her benefit.

After dinner we took off for my room to find quiet for a little while. I wanted to hold her, seek her neck for warmth, kiss her skin. Lanie kept a fence around herself and would not reach for an opening. She allowed me to hold on comfortably, nothing more. Her fingers softly touched my hands here and there, but I knew her head was all the way around the discussion and need to lift me. I had been accustomed to Juliette allowing me to touch her in any manner I desired, to the point of dreaming that Lanie might do the same. The sex was not there at all. In my mind? Her pants and the joy inside. In her mind? Therapy. Fuck. Whatever she wished was the road I took, both in hopes of being stable enough to enjoy the resorts, and that I might eventually see those glasses come off and her hair flying everywhere. Yep... My toy. Although, meeting Ashley and the God-knows-what which was in her pretty head was just around the corner. Part of me still dreamed on and off of her look and those cute eyes while hanging off Lanie's shoulder. I could not help it.

'Your hair smells lovely.'

No comment, but a slight smile. I knew the deal and kept trying anyway. Her features drove me nuts, causing a fight inside between absolutely jumping her for hours or being respectful and keeping a distance, letting her help me. Lanie started to change the way she addressed me, as if I was on the couch in an office and paying a fee. She genuinely wished to see me work through my tremendous issues and revealed that her happiness was often derived from seeing others the same. Wow, what a person. My fucking need to press my lips to her was being squashed like a fucking worm on the interstate. She pushed gently, inquired deeply, and successfully caused me to really consider what I had been through as well as the control I had over the road ahead. Huh? But... What about the breasts?

'Shut up about that and focus.'

Holy shit. Lanie was in control of the evening and I did not mind. Onward she went, allowing me room to speak my mind while drawing out what had me so down. Juliette and my reasoning for running away, the trip to Furnace Creek, Ashley and the heroin between her thighs... All the way back to Jasmine and forward in time to Lori. We talked on and on, eventually leaving me quite tired. Lanie could see the troubled thoughts through my gaze and stated that we were done for a time. Relax. Take the night and absorb her words and the little things she told me to repeat in my head until meeting again. What a fucking person she turned out to be. I began to glance at her neck and chest again, along with an inkling to reach for her. Lanie sensed it and moved in for a hug. Whispering in her soft, breathy voice...

'That will only cause you more harm. Please, stay on course, ok? Try?'

God damn her and God bless her. Jesus fuck I wished for her nipples but the door was locked. Nothing.

'Look, we can meet again tomorrow and talk more, but in public. I need to trust in what we have covered and see if it helps, my dear. Please, leave the sex out right now, ok?'

Fuck shit crap anyway, her sweetness and intentions broke my physical desire and I fucking gave up. The war in my head was done, just as my hopes of bouncing her off every surface in the fucking room. Just damn. Why did she have to look so delicious and then turn into a doctor? Ugh... Breasts, thighs, ass, lips... nope. Fuck no. And how did she do that? How did that woman exorcise the strongest need in my being? Jesus. I pondered Lanie's words for several moments as she stared, and was left with the desire to do as she requested. Broken. I could feel her eyes like knives in my heart. Lanie took my hand and kissed it, stood me up, hugged, and stated it was time for her to leave. Fuck me sideways in the snow.

'See you tomorrow at eleven for brunch. The Island, dear, eleven. Don't break Ashley in half.' Giggle. 'Goodnight.'

Out the door with her ass in my eyes. What a person. She effectively spun me further than any of my prior therapists, and I did not railroad her as was the fashion anytime I felt uncomfortable. Lanie had a way of being very pleasant and gentle as she drew answers from me. I was not accustomed to being caught off guard, either. Generally, I maintained control -- in a manner of speaking -- and the reasoning behind such force was me not allowing any change. My reckless behavior throughout many years was one of the factors which defined and helped to make me into a deep-thinking mind with the ability to calm others and solve problems with efficiency. All of my inner issues added together turned me into a type of analytical and sensitive person -- one which was complimented time and again by others. Lanie had effectively shut me down -- which was rare -- especially considering my penchant for pushing people into a small, inescapable box and sealing it with pointed words. She was wonderful, and our being together started to edge me away from the addiction and toward emotional comfort. What a woman she was to get that out of me, if temporarily.

Out as quickly as she came in, and Ashley soon after. Oy. I stayed comfortable in the room a little longer before venturing back down to the casino. From there, I decided to swing through the Island before heading in the direction of the Tropicana. There was time, so running into Lori and her bouncing breasts sounded nice, especially after having my sexual desire damned near surgically removed by Lanie. I needed to bring it back prior to meeting the little blonde ass and her unending cuteness. As I arrived within sight of the service bar, Lori waved slightly and smiled. Oh God, I think she grew taller during dinner. Jesus. I walked to the service bar to say hello and received the most sensual hug. She said she was hoping to see me, and... tons of glances from others at the bar along with hellos from several servers. Wow. I guess I had spent some time there. Lori's smile floored me, full of brightness and appreciation. She was close to end of shift and asked if I wished to stroll the boulevard. For fuck's sake, I had to meet Ashley and her thong drug soon, so I declined Lori's offer and asked to meet her the next day.

'Absolutely, handsome.'

Hand to cheek, appraising looks from the other servers, and my head full of yikes. Off I went toward the Excalibur with the young one on my mind. God love her and that flowing hair. Um, yeah. Into the castle with an hour remaining. To the pub for a coffee and some time to reflect on my time with Lanie and her fucking unreal attention.


Ashley and her dreamy form

Ashley was awaiting my arrival when I dropped to street level from the escalator. Her big, bright smile and excited eyes drew me in quickly. As I walked to her, the response was overwhelming in that she dashed toward me and jumped up, taking hold and kissing my neck. Holy fuck, I was surprised at her reaction, however it was nowhere near unwanted.

'Hi you!'

Damn. She held tight and expressed joy at my being there. Ashley was so fucking adorable that I almost could not contain myself. She looked beautiful from head to toe with a pair of black jeans, tank, and boots to her knees. Christ, her outfit made my head spin over and over. And upon reaching close, I realized her height was wondrous. For being so fucking thin, the girl had to have been standing five foot nine without the Goddamned heels. I looked up and smiled, leading her to embrace me a second time. Jesus God she was thin. But her chest pressed into mine with force. Ashley grabbed my face and stated how happy she was that I met her that night. I could not take my fucking depressed eyes off her young face, and upon looking into my eyes her smile widened.

'Wanna go to the barge?' God help me.
'Fuck yes, beautiful.' Another smile.

I would have gone anywhere just to be near that little thing. Her hair, eyes, thin legs... Holy hell in a clutch. We took to the bridge and headed north. Along the way Ashley was clinging to my arm as we talked lightly about her work and my trip. I avoided everything which led me to the Island that day, and kept the line in view. I wanted to enjoy without falling into the whole Lanie-therapy vat of depression. Ashley seemed very happy and I needed to keep her that way. A positive soul next to me, and her age was a part of it all. Once nearing the Palace, she stopped us and took my hands.

'You seem tired, old man.' Ha! That was cute.
'Sorry, the day has been long.'
'Let's go to my place and take it easy instead, ok?'
'Sure.' Hideous mindset creeping in... Uh oh. Stop.

She rerouted us back across the boulevard and through PH to their big garage. Into her car, and along the strip south a short distance. Apartment complex, parked, out. Again Ashley stopped me. A big hug and kiss on the cheek, then continuing to her studio. As we entered, I noticed a very clean space, void of clutter, with extra racks for her world of clothing. The apartment was tiny but well-organized. Door closed. Ashley all over me like a second skin.

'Oh my God, sit down.'

I plopped on her sofa and she immediately climbed on top and smothered me with attention. I was taken aback so much that she was forced to pause and take a breath.

'I'm sorry. I had to. Are you ok?'

Jesus fuck she was so cute and looking into my eyes with much desire, both to enjoy and to please. Damn, and her body was devoid of anything other than skin and muscle. I ran my hands all over -- causing her to lean into me -- and marveled at her form. I kept away from her chest or roaming too far down her ass, and found myself fighting to keep it simple. I really needed to rest, but I could have had anything, all of her, everything. Lanie and her wonderful heart had me thinking more than diving, as I seemed to be more interested in just being close. Ashley knew I was not relaxed, so she kissed my cheek and pushed me to lay down, where she laid against me and wrapped my arms into hers. That was so nice. We remained in such a position for a while, every now and then with a smooch here and there.

And then my head took a slam. Lanie's words... 'Don't break her in half.' Well, I was doing nothing of the sort. I looked at her face so young, eyes bright and hopeful, and that hair all over the place and could not move.

'Are you ok, old man?'

Smiles. She looked so fucking cute laying there with her boot wedged between my thighs and the corners of her mouth curled upward.

'Wanna lay in my bed?' Oof.

Ashley arose, lifted me, undressed me to the boxers, and gently led me across the room, sitting me on the edge. She then yanked her top off, revealing her little red bra, and then losing the boots and pants to reveal the narrowest waist I had ever seen, and just below, a string thong matching the fabric covering her breasts. Little red bows, lace, and contrast to her fair skin. I drooled for a second and then ran my fingers on her tummy, pushing the desire part way back into my head and partially displacing the hesitation. Ashley allowed my touching, afterward climbing in and holding on. Her leg again went between mine, and I stayed still... Smelling her hair and perfume. God damn, a few minutes of quiet and the blood began to rush south. Fuck.

'Well, hello there.' She smiled as I apologized for displaying desire.
'It is natural, it's ok.' God love her anyway.
'You have me if you want, my dear. Just do whatever you wish, as long as you're ok with it.'
'Can we just lay here a while?'

Ashley nodded and again held on. No wandering hands, no words of lust. Only togetherness. I was reminded of Juliette and me doing the same for hours. Lying there together was warm and comfortable, and Ashley's eyes conveyed the same as she fondled my fingers with her slender hands. I was pulled for a time back to Lanie and her analysis and subsequent dissection of my mind, leaving me to need the attention even more. The beginnings of tears were developing. Ashley stared with her beautiful windows and began to appear sympathetic, just as Juliette. I fell to her and snuggled tightly. She held on and whispered, thanking me for being there.

'I knew you were tender, my dear. I knew it. In your eyes.'

Fucking shit, and I couldn't even attack her body. Why? Because Lanie affected me so much that the thought had been flattened like fucking pasta through the rollers. Ashley was right there with the fucking heroin up against me, all warm and waiting. But she was also very sweet, leaving me to the embrace and all which came with it. I could feel myself being drawn in and enjoying it so much that I calmed and held on, despite no barrier other than some lovely lace between my lips and her delicacy. Fuck. Just as I began to feel dreamy in that warm bed, Ashley took me in hand and plunged her tongue. Blood pressure, all the way that time. Her hands wandered as she pulled her face back slightly and whispered...

'Let me take it all away my dear. Let me help you.'

Holy Jesus in a used car, she slammed me out of my thoughtful condition and made everything disappear. Ashley moved herself around, tossed the thong I wanted to consume, gently plopped that little ass on my face, and took me completely. The barrier disappeared, words ceased, and I became lost in passion. Lanie? Gone instantly.

A little while later, and after she posed me in a dozen ways, we fell back to the sheets and drifted off. Just... Damn.

I awakened some hours later for the bathroom, and Ashley's little night light caused her skin to glow. I stood and stared at her, lying on one side to face me, and lost my shit. She was there on top of the covers, lying on her side with knees together and hands under the pillow. Good Christ the vision was stunning. Staring, swirling with thoughts of Juliette, Lanie and her comforting words, and me... In Ashley's apartment gazing at her little ass and those fantastic radii leading into an oval around her beautiful labia. Part of me felt like dying inside over everything which had transpired throughout days and days, coupled with my feelings inside regarding such a damaging addiction. She stirred in the light shimmering from the bathroom, looked up to me and smiled.

'Do you mind if I just look at you for a while?'
'Not at all, lover.'


Yep, she was that fucking cute

Ashley stayed still and closed her eyes, smiling. I moved to the edge of the bed and sat, gazing at the most intimate of pictures, and attempting to consolidate myself with the trip and connections with such an array of women. Closer I moved toward her ass, and further I went from any level of understanding myself at all. That girl was a fucking dreamy fantasy much like Juliette, and my brain was at a huge loss in trying to make sense of the actions and paths over so many years. Damage, repair, band-aids in my head, lust, and absolute worship. A fucking cyclone of shit and desire, pain and depression, sex and love. God fucking help me. And then my mind tried to absorb the gorgeous shape of Ashley's unreal body parts staring back at me, and I fell into the black chasm for the zillionth time with the fucking dreamy curves inches from my eyes. I stared, and nearly died. Ashley dozed off, nude and picturesque like nothing I could have imagined. Eventually I snuggled up to her and fell asleep. Warmth, and something I badly needed... Rest, from the inside out.

In the morning Ashley arose and showered alone, leaving me listening to the water and deep in thought. Her bed was very comfortable and smelled all over like a combination of conditioner and perfume. Wonderful. As I laid there still, things which had been floating through my mind the night before seemed to have eased some, and I found myself considering the long conversation between Lanie and myself during the previous evening. She wished to learn of why I continued to run from my life and into the arms of any woman who might allow me to latch on. I had few answers to any of it. Lanie pushed anyway, hoping to help me locate a positive direction. Why? There was no knowing, but her sweet caring began to draw me back. She told me to meet her for brunch, yet there I was, nude in Ashley's home and awaiting whatever was ahead.

The water ceased and that young beauty emerged from the bathroom wrapped in towels. I asked if she needed to work, and the response was we had rolled into her weekend. Hmm. She lost the towels and stood there, warm and fresh and looking like dessert. Damn it, my instinct was to enjoy her tenderness again, and apparently such an idea was all over my face. Smiling, Ashley came to me and laid down with her knees up. God damn, the heroin was displayed beautifully right next to me so I took the initiative and slid to the floor, centering my face directly before her gorgeous sex and gazed again. Her breathing intensified as I caressed those thin thighs, moving along to the place of dreams. Gently, softly, over and over. Writhing, moaning, and her hand slapped to the back of my head. Some time later I ceased motion and she sighed heavily and rolled over to face me.

'Oh my God.'

Fuck me, I could not decide whether to shower and dress, or bounce her body around the room. One minute later the blood pressure became overwhelming and she fondled until I had to feel her again. I flipped Ashley over and she arched her back and presented her thin self on all fours, ass gyrating in wait. She then threw that long mane up and over her back, and the hair was so fucking long that it brushed my chest before splitting and falling to the sheets. I dove and pulled for moments until she reached between her legs and tickled, and I could take no more. Flop, back to lying down and holding each other.

'We need to do this more, lover.'

Oy crap, okay. Later, please. She was so fucking gorgeous and shapely, pushing me to consider everything else we might do. Holy fucking God to the hilt, I had to have it. Ashley, my toy of dreams. And me hers.

'Let's get coffee and croissants, ok?'
'Certainly, you fucking dream.' Smile. Embrace.
'You can shower in the hotel, mister man.'

Fuck was she ever cute. What was it? A fling within the need for another fling? Fuck me, I went with it anyway, and hearing Lanie in my head the entire time. I dressed and we traveled back to the Luxor, up to my room where I showered and placed my laundry on the door handle. Ashley waited in front of the television, looking like a million dollars in stretch pants, heeled boots, and that fucking hair all over. Her little top had just enough open space for me to see cleavage. I stared as she sat there smiling and running one manicured nail up and down along the button line. So fucking gorgeous, I almost could not think. I was scheduled to meet Lanie at eleven, and in telling Ashley I tried to come across as if the session was therapy. She came right back stating that I was also her own patient. Huh? Therapy of the sex? Jeez... she was something else. Of all the women I had met flying between states, Lanie and Ashley took the fucking cake with regard to their wishes to help me. Was I worth all that? What? Whatever. Ashley sat there while I dressed, and I asked her to place her knees together so I could stare from above. Smile, knees touching, and my vision blurred to a dramatic degree. Longer I gazed, and then she told me something completely out of left field.


A wonderland of unbelievable smoothness

'Melanie asked me to come along.'

The fuck? A conspiracy to keep me up, plus sexcapades for joy? The sex aspect was not a fucking problem. Apparently I had become a study, though. Ashley went on about her conversation with Lanie. Happiness while I stayed in Vegas. Wow, no issue there -- at least not on the outside. My years and years of inner trauma were not going to be ironed out in a week's time by anyone, but spending time in Ashley's fucking beautiful company wouldn't hurt, either. Well, I had hoped not anyway. As she told me a few things related to them speaking privately, Ashley slowly made her way over to me and stood very close, smiling. She took my hands and let me know in no uncertain terms that I would cared for while visiting, both emotionally and physically. Oh boy. She stood before me and smiled lovingly while holding both my hands. Thoughts of Juliette again, along with less concern over brunch with Lanie. Somehow, Ashley had the ability to calm me with those eyes of hers. The hand-holding felt like we had been together for years, too. I do not know why, but her closeness just threw me. Ashley looked like Alexis, in more ways than one. That smile disarmed me completely and left my mind in solace. And sometimes overwhelming lust. Her similarities to Alexis were many, but the eyes and full, smiling lips just fucking took the cake. She killed me with the facial expressions and I felt as if nothing could harm me while within her gaze. So fucking comforting.

We gathered our thoughts together a little longer and then took off for the Island. Meeting Lanie still had me a tad nervous -- like heading to a psychiatry appointment -- but Ashley wrapped to me helped greatly. She was warm and wonderful, whispering appreciation for my company on the walk. Chrissakes, what a dreamy girl on my arm. As we approached the Island, I saw Lanie smiling away and awaiting the two of us. We greeted her, and spoke of where to eat, which led us to the buffet inside the castle. I was never a buffet person, but whatever they wanted was fine. I felt like the patient with a pair of beautiful doctors, and their wishes were my command. I was at the mercy of two minds and four breasts, the latter being half the pull. Not bad. Naturally, I spent the first moments at the table dreaming of sex with both women all over me. There was just no getting around it.

Brunch was relaxing and full of positive thinking and discussion. Ashley's soft voice was killing me along with Lanie and her fucking pointed words, so I decided to sling a line over the water and stir things up in a different direction. I sat quietly, sipping a mimosa, and then tossed out that Lanie would look dynamite in green lingerie, matching her hazel eyes. Well, that stopped any forward motion and caused a lecture to begin. Oops. Ashley laughed and stated that after several orgasms she understood my desire to push. Lanie's reaction? Seriousness and a stern gaze. Yikes. What to do? Push more.

'I need your nipples between my lips, doctor Melanie.'

Ashley lost her shit and laughed uncontrollably. Lanie? Nothing more than a quick giggle and back to business.


Body fat? Nope... Ashley had none of it

'Why? What is it?'
'An addiction of sorts which I am powerless to control. Leave it, doll.'
'Can you put it on the back burner please?'
'Not really.'

More of Ashley's adorable laughter as she clinged to my arm. I loved it so much. Every now and then her smooch would set me ablaze and cause visions of the delicacy within her warm thong. There was no avoiding that dream. The two of them continued with my psychoanalysis and I let up with the sexfest thinking. As the conversation and meal progressed, Lanie softened quite a bit and allowed me comments here and there. She was a very genuine person with such a soft way about her, and I found myself actually trying to be receptive. She was so fucking sweet and gorgeous and helpful that I eventually shut off the carnal fucking storm entirely, trying to respect her seriousness. Ashley quieted as well, and offered a tidbit here and there when prompted. The entire shitaree ended up focusing and narrowing to only the issues I had carried for a decade. The longer we sat and spoke, the more I appreciated Lanie's unending kindness and caring. For me to lose sight of the Goddamned heroin both women had attached to them seemed impossible at the outset, but happened nonetheless. Fuck me in a cardboard box. I still wanted a massive fuckfest, however it ended up pushed back so far that I could barely reach in such a direction. God bless her. The thongs I wished to see flying across my hotel room only flew out of my squeezed brain.

A text message from Lori. Oy. Dermal implants, long blond hair, and those big, round breasts caused me to surf my mind back to the physical need. My head blew up and I laid it gently on my hands. God damn it anyway, the mess came back, I drooled over all three women, and lost my way. Ashley held on and Lanie's concern melted me into a pool of sex and shit. But for some reason it was ok, so I recovered a bit and addressed them both with everything I could offer. Soft eyes, hands on mine, and more of the doctoring from Lanie. So fucking sweet, that soul. We spoke further and decided to leave it all alone for the rest of the day and turn our attention toward finding relaxation. I turned to Ashley and whispered needs into her waiting ear, to which she responded with a nod and kiss to my cheek. We stood, I hugged Lanie tightly -- thanking her for being so wonderful toward a basket case -- and we exited the big buffet. Directly to my home two hotels away, and through the inclinator with snippets of Juliette's eyes floating within my damaged head. Ashley never stopped smiling the entire way, and remained against me as much as possible. Once in private, she held on, eyes to eyes, and revealed that she had taken three more days off work to spend with me, if I wished it. My heart leaped for the first time since Juliette professing her love into my waiting ear. I told Ashley that she was welcome to stay with me, and she threw me to the bed, climbed on top and thrusted her tongue into my mouth while holding my face. Pulling away...


A deep breath later and I felt as if I would survive at least until her exit. After that? Nope. Did not care at all. Ashley wanted it, and so did I. Upon hearing of her desire, Lanie was removed from my head immediately, leaving only the prior state of comfort and desire. I knew Ashley could be what I constantly and so badly needed, along with her providing the tiny push over that same critical line I had crossed so many fucking times. Once she kissed me, the line was instantly behind me. We regrouped for a bit, and then decided to take our overjoyed asses elsewhere. Thank God for her.

Damage, despair, depression, and dismal moments on the horizon. In view? Everything Ashley. Jesus Christ in a fucking bulldozer, she was mine and I hers, and for days to come. Fuck yes. The possibilities were flying like seagulls over a crowded beach in summer.

Out of the room and to the big inclinator, during which we held hands tightly as if a wrestler was about to attempt a separation. We spoke quietly regarding things to see and do, after which Ashley said she only wanted to be close. Not a problem. The girl took me away from everything already, leaving her desire to be together like the icing. My head was filled with need that morning, but by the time we reached the casino floor all of it was wrapped up neatly in the soul next to me. I tried to reconcile everything -- mostly the recent connection with that young beauty and her becoming fucking glued to me -- but my head failed to make sense of it. No matter, I calculated, because the joy and warmth of mind and body were more than enough to help me arrive in that most necessary of locales.

Across the club and out through the driveway to the huge strip. Ashley stopped us, with her endless flowing hair all over in the wind, and told me that there was nowhere else in the world she wished to be at that moment. Days together, looking forward to whatever we had in mind, and holding on for life.

How in the fuck did that happen?


Ashley was a dead match to Alexis. Unreal.

We slowly strolled all the way north to the Palazzo, Ashley's long arms around mine the entire way. Through the doors and up to First. The bar was busy but we managed to locate some space. Sidling up, I began to relax about Juliette and center myself with Ashley and her attentive presence. I then told her that anything she wished was my intention, and she needed to be as happy as I. Smile, hug, smooch.

'I am.'

Oh boy, where were we to go from there? Her eyes showed me much. Staring into those lovely pools was beginning to allow me more comfort than I had felt since the previous morning. No worries, time limit, or decisions. Lanie's helpful and gentle pushing combined with Ashley and her big heart to bring me up, pressing me toward the kindness and appreciation I had to send back the other way. I told them both as much during brunch, but still there had to be more. The two women were saving me from myself and illuminating a forward path void of regrets over my prior decisions and actions. I felt good for a change, far from the man who determined that the best path would be through that thirtieth floor window. Further up and into a place which bred clear thinking, with Ashley glued to me the whole way. Yikes, but I went with it.

The two of us sat a while and talked about everything. Ashley brought up my impending date with Lori, to which I told her with certainty that it would not be taking place due to the joy of being where I was. I needed no more entanglements, only some stability. Ashley then stated that she was mine. Fuck me on a rototiller... Nice. But... Huh? I met her the previous fucking day, did I not? Oh boy, that was unexpected, even considering us latching on so quickly. Not that I pushed against such a lovely thought. I embraced it... and her. Again she said my eyes displayed everything, including a large measure of inner turmoil which she both understood and wished to ease. Well, that was already happening thanks to her beautiful soul showing through those limpid pools of emotion. And so young, too. Ashley was wonderful. I kept picturing her gliding around the casino in her little black dress and dreaming of being alone again. That would happen soon enough, though, and her eyes told me as much. We continued to discuss everything related to my trip as well as Lanie and her forceful manner toward my difficulties. Ashley was very insightful and understanding, mostly about the two of us being so connected very quickly. Her wisdom came forth, placing us inside a time-dependent space which had the outside world locked out. I loved it, and felt similarly to the past days with Juliette. The difference? We covered the end before any overwhelming heat.

Ashley was beyond beautiful, from the inside out.

We left the glow of First after a couple of hours and reversed course toward the Luxor. The walk south was as warm as our venture north. Ashley's contact and facial expressions clearly showed me that her words were genuine and her heart true. I did my damnedest to project the same. Sliding into the castle, I stopped her and asked if she was allowed to stay in a Luxor hotel room. Yes was the answer, and I proceeded to invite that girl to stay with me. Yes again, but the second occasion brought the eyes and that cute hand to her lip. I was instantly enamored with all of Ashley's mannerisms, not to mention her walking next to me and looking like Alexis right off a fucking magazine cover. Jesus. And though her unending beauty constantly had me a tad edgy, inside I was feeling more comfortable knowing that we matched each other so well. The tension had a release, and one which was available for the asking. Her age had not become a concern, even with over fourteen years separating our births. Oy.

Back to the castle, and through to the pyramid. We stopped off at Aurora -- with memories of Juliette next to me easing some -- and plopped at a table. More conversation was on tap for the afternoon, including some ideas for a nice dinner. Ashley told me that room service would be preferable and dessert could be the provocative lingerie she had in mind. Upon hearing such delicious thoughts, I lost a good portion of brainpower in favor of her lovely heroin. She laughed at my stumbling attempts to speak and just smiled. The bitten lip again which drove me up the wall. So fucking cute. A pair of cocktails later and we made a path to my room. Once behind a locked door, Ashley came to me for a lengthy hug, and her eyes were huge. Wonderful. We took a seat on the sofa and talked of our being together, Lanie, and things to do over the next few days. By that time, the room had been mine for several days, feeling in some ways like a second home. My life was so far back that I hardly considered anything outside the present situation. Juliette notwithstanding, the resort brought me some comfort which had been badly needed for years. And though temporary, the space I forced to be available was a stretch that allowed much exploration -- the type of which I hoped would help me move forward upon returning to California. The glaring alternative was not pretty. Juliette was in a similar bowl of soup in the beginning, causing us to cover such a dim subject often. Extra days after her departure had been a godsend, not to mention the soul of Ashley along for the ride. My mindset was being lifted out of the mire like an oiled bird from the ocean. The situation helped me to enjoy the attention from that young girl. Although the opposite direction was always there and not pretty, Ashley's skin was the beauty. I had lost interest in pouncing on Lori or Lanie, and the possibility that Ashley wanted me exclusively flashed itself often. She was a comforting presence. Juliette brought the same, however there were differences I wished to avoid digesting. Ashley desired my time and company for her own pleasure, but Juliette began as an emotional wreck and needed someone to help her rise out of all the difficulties. My own issues were along similar lines, and together we did well for each other. I had hoped for the same with Ashley.

Dinner was ordered along with wine and coffee, leaving Ashley and me to wait comfortably. Further conversation while sitting together left us in a good and positive place. We covered Lanie's therapeutic efforts as I informed Ashley that the desire to be with that woman had been taken away, along with the same regarding Lori. The girl looked at me as if I had created a beautiful place for us and held me again.

'Thank you.'

We relaxed, ate and drank, and then snuggled into the sofa for a while. Quiet moments with Ashley whispering sweet nothings into my ear, and her long, slender fingers all over mine. Sound familiar? Yep. All of my needs being fulfilled far from home. Again. Fuck... did I learn anything?"